waiter

Posted: December 23rd, 2010 | Author: | Filed under: Poetry | No Comments »

I can’t care
I don’t want to
I wouldn’t dare
If I didn’t love you
But what am I to do
If I can’t have you
Because you are such a big fucking prick
But you aren’t
Am I?
Maybe
But who am I to decide that

You are you I am me
But you fucked around
You made a fool of me
But I don’t care so much
About being a fool
Just that you thought
You could love another
Girl

Shouldn’t I just break
Away
Surge through
Find something anew?

I can’t get fast enough away from you
You rot my brain till nothing remains
But an empty skull
Aching in misery
You scooped it all out of me
Everything that held you there
You fawned on another
Thought you not mine
Fuck that I say
I cannot heal
Rather I just ban you to the side
Away
Out of sight
Where you will become just a
Hopefully fond memory

You are sweet
But you make me sick
I love you
But I can’t imagine how
Love must be so great
I must be good at it
Many have tried and failed
Will that be your fate?

All over what?
A wondering EYE
A healthy lust
Ego
Not calling me

I refuse to care
Because it makes me crazy
And despite what some think
I don’t like to be too crazy
Just a little
Bit
Is nice

But YOU
What have you done to me?
Made me a horrible evil mockery
I don’t know my place
I don’t know my mind
All I do is search you out
To find your hidden love
That you only give me
Sometimes

So what do I do?
Wait
Wait

For potentially nothing to come?

No, that is not my fate.



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